Stay at home mom vs. The working Mom…
Which is harder?
Don’t answer that.
It’s a stupid question. Well, Uh.. Brit? My 3rd grade teacher told me that their were no stupid questions. Well no offense Mrs. Paddigan in 3B, but some questions are stupid. More importantly, “Is it harder to be a stay at home mom or a working mom?” That would qualify as one.
There is no harder. Just hard in different ways.
There is no better. Just better in different ways.
The last month of school year, I counted down the days. The Summer was like a shiny beacon of light at the end of the tunnel. The school year had been hard and stressful. You could actual classify this school year as tragic. Being a new Mother and still wading through the seas of the postpartum underworld did not make the school year any easier. One time this school year I simultaneously shuffled students out of a gym and watched out of my peripherals, as one of my coworkers used life saving first aide on a student. A student who’s heart stopped beating. I saw a life get saved, literally. Well then I watched that same student walk across the stage and graduate last weekend, and I’m pretty sure my heart stopped beating for a second. Around the same time this Spring I hugged a woman right after she buried her son. I felt my insides shake. I wanted to throw up. I wanted to hug her longer. But instead of being a creep and holding onto her, I opted to tell her a story instead. The last encounter I had with her son prior to his passing:
She laughed. I laughed. Then we cried.
After long emotional days sometimes you just want to crawl into bed and get some serious sleep. But you know who doesn’t care about any of this? You know who could really give a shit about my tough school year for myself and all my coworkers? My baby. That’s who. Oh Mom you had a tough day? You are surrounded by smiles that you love but they are all frowning? Well that’s too bad. I’m going to wake up about an hour after you crawl into bed and scream my brains out. Oh and for a bonus if you drag ass out of bed and don’t hurry, I will wake up my brother for double the fun. And don’t you try to change my diaper in the dark, you best be sure I filled that up.
Oh ya, you’re somebody’s mother..
“Just two more weeks” I’d say to myself while driving in.
Two more weeks and I won’t have to feel like I’m playing the amazing race in the morning to get us all out the door. Starting so early yet still running back inside for god knows what.
“Just one more week” I’d repeat over and over in my brain as I wipe shit off my shirt because the baby started twisting his body around while you changed him in the back of the Jeep. My children WILL NOT lay on their backs when I change them. They are wild animals and freak out. It is so ridiculously annoying and I should be A LOT skinnier from all the calories I burn changing them. Ultimately, I throw my shirt in the garbage because I’m impulsive and pissed off. It was $9.99 at Forever 21 anyways. It had run its course. Good thing you have 1,000 items in your Jeep now because once you get two children who are under two in from the car, you don’t usually go back out and unload the rest. Is that just me? Oh well.
Look who’s laughing now! I have a new shirt to wear, it doesn’t quite match my pants, but beggars can’t be choosers. At least I’m not heading to work in a poop shirt. Or back to my house to change and have to call my boss once again and be like, “I’m really really sorry, but I’m going to be late. Insert Mom problem.” So black and brown together it is! The baby is laughing in his car seat. He is only wearing a clean diaper, otherwise he is naked and chuckling. I say out loud to him, “Oh you think this is funny?”
“Just one more day” I’d think and I put aloe all over my burnt chest before I head to work. Sometimes I’m so focused on sun blocking and clothing and packing up everybody in my house that I forget myself. I spent a half hour sun blocking people and putting them in SPF shirts and yet I come home burnt. Welcome to Motherhood…
So….. Here we are.
Day one of the SUMMER.
Stay at home Mom Summer.
Hmm.. Well I’m always excited to spend time with my best homies, but this will bring new challenges. I counted down the days, not because I don’t like my job. I do like it. I just needed space to breathe. So this Summer I will just be Mom. I’m pretty excited to just focus on my family for a bit. But with great family time also comes a price. Long gone are the days where you have an hour lunch break and you can eat a Sandwich with a work friend. Even if its in the school cafeteria. (I know, so luxurious) You don’t know how wonderful adult interaction is until it’s gone. Now I know what you will say! Um, Britt.. You can take your babies to lunch, you can hang with friends, you can do anything now! Sadly, that is untrue.
I can go to lunch with friends! I can do a million things with the boys this Summer and we will! But not always when I feel like it. That’s the beauty of kids. They’re like, “Oh you have a big great day planned for us tomorrow? Super. Sounds awesome. You already packed? Wow. Good for you Mom. So I’ll be in your bed at 4 AM then to throw up on you??” Sounds about right.
Maybe someone will get strep throat in the middle of the Summer? Maybe someone will teethe so hard that they need to be quarantined to our back yard. Who knows what they have in store for me! All I know is now I’m in the 24/7 land. I’ve been there before. I was fortunate enough to take off 5 months after each of them was born. I loved it. It flew by. But the “years are short but the days are long.” When babies be acting a fool you can sometimes feel like you are losing your mind a bit. There are no car rides alone to work.
Mental note, buy better kids music for the car. You can only listen to the Mary had a little lamb so many times before you start to think that Mary is a idiot and needs to leave her sheep at home where he belongs. I need more hakunnah mata in my life.
So in my excessive coffee drinking and pondering this morning, I decided that me and the boys definitely need to be busy. Make the most of our time. Make up for this horrid Winter that locked us up. We don’t need an exact schedule for the Summer. Cause they will just mess that up for fun. But I will create a SUMMER BUCKET LIST of things we are going to do this Summer. Busy is good! SO here goes nothing!
- The zoo and the aquarium! We have never been! Eek! How exciting. I can’t wait to wake Ben up and be like, “Hey dude, I think we need to see some monkeys today.” I also can’t wait for the boys to see sea lion clapping and watch their little brains explode. The library gives FREE tickets to the zoo. How AMAZING!
- Make hand and feet imprints of the boys in large cement circles to decorate the garden. Better do it soon. Before I know it their hands and feet are going to be so big 🙁
- Make a CHART that I can have Ben put stars on when I accomplish certain tasks. Yes, I am competitive, but mostly only with myself these days. I can always be a better Brit. I do need some motivation though. Some of this weight has to go. I did not factor in how hot and sweaty I would be this Summer from being a big fine lady. On the chart I will put days I walked, went to the beach, and went to bikram yoga. So if I have 72 days off I’m going to aim for 32 days of walking 4+ miles. I’d like to shoot for 20 beach days. Last but not least, I’m going to aim for 16 yoga classes. That’s 2x per week. What a life. What a wonderful life. Time to take control of my own health back.
- Catch a frog, Collect shells, fly a kite, and roll down 4 hills.
- Check out the nature center near us. They have animal story circle, how glorious. Also, Heritage Gardens near me has a certified outdoor classroom. We are going to need to see this for ourselves. Especially because I spent 75% of my childhood asking if we could have class outside. Remember it’s free fridays for museums in MA this Summer.
- Get family pictures done! This was the age I had them done with baby boy #1. Let us not completely drop the ball on baby #2.
- On Friday’s the community center has $5 skate rentals for Mom’s. Then you can push the stroller on the ice and go ice skating. THIS may be #1 activity for us to cross off this list.
- Take the boys on the boat!! First family boat outing? I will be so anxious the whole time but my desire to show the boys the ocean trumps that feeling.
- Make bird houses. We live in a bird sanctuary. They need some condos.
- Make 10 new friends.
- Sing the ABC’s everyday.
- See as MUCH family as possible. Squeeze them tight.
- Watch 10 sunsets.
- Make a slip and slide, obviously.
- Make water balloons. Throw them at Dad.
- TIME CAPSULE!!!
- Visit Mom’s 1st job and eat large amounts of ice cream.
- Teach Ben how to cook a smore. Keep Jack as far away as possible.
- Have 72 sporadic dance parties.
- Appreciate the people around us.
Here we go Summer!
Oh and um, when we are not galavanting around Cape Cod and surrounding areas. I’ll be cleaning, cooking, exercising, feeding toddlers, running errands,waking up at 5 am everyday because my children are farmers, getting peed on, sweating through my shirt because the baby won’t stop clinging to me, more feeding children, hosing down the dog from playing in the pond, putting my legs up on a wall, and then feeding the kids again. Do they ever stop eating? BJ’s Wholesale Club proudly welcomes the Burbank family.
I can do this!